IRS Wednesday Golf League Newsletter
Week 15 – August 2, 2017
Luckily
we only had a slight weather delay. So
far, knock on wood, we have no rain-outs.
I did see some teams trying to do a rain dance but to no avail. Top 6 seeds are still tight.
League Outing
info:
League
Outing is scheduled for September 8, 2017, at A.J. Jolly Golf Course. Shotgun start at 10 a.m. Cost this year will be the same as last
year. Caterer will be the same (menu
will be Steak, Chicken Breast, Salad, Sides, and Dessert) cost is also same as
last year. Golf fee includes golf, cart,
beverages, lunch, and door prizes.
·
Regulars
– Golf and Dinner: $70.00; Golf only: $55.00
·
Subs/Guest
– Golf and Dinner: $80.00; Golf only: $65.00
·
Skins
- $5.00, Greenies - $3.00, Long Putts - $2.00
Treasurer
Chuck Reckers will start taking outing payments (checks will not be cashed
until September 9). Pouches will be in
the briefcase.
Get
the word out to your subs/guest/etc. that Team Anderson will be taking sign-ups.
Send email to Charlie Halpin (halpinc@aol.com) or phone/text (859-512-1822). We have a sign up
sheet in the briefcase to get a count on golfers and dinners.
League
Scramble:
League
Scramble is scheduled for August 30 (this is a paid week). Per President Tom Schumacher the format this
year will be similar to last year, 2 player scramble. Players will be divided up into A, B, C, and
D. A & D would hit their drives then
play best ball, then each would finish out their own
ball and post the low score of the two.
B & C player would hit their drives then play best ball, then each would finish out their own ball and post the low
score of the two.
Prior
to setting up the teams please let Charlie Halpin know if you have a preference
on an early tee time or a late tee time.
Tee time schedule will not be out until after the last position round.
SUBS:
This
week we had 11 subs: Kelly Johnson and
Kevin Schumacher (for Team Schumacher); Larry Oliver and Izzy Jewell (for Team
Kiffmeyer); Mary Jo Leirey (for Team Kientz); Matt McRoberts (for Team
Buescher); Greg Arkle (for Team Harms); Bob Kendrach (for Team Halpin); Dave
Spaeth (for Team Breen); and new subs Mark Slye Sr. and Paul Haubner (for Team
Slye). Thanks for being there.
Good rounds this
week were:
Front – Tom Schumacher – 38, Bill
Zachritz -38, Larry Oliver - 39.
Back
–Kevin Bachmann – 36, Paul Haubner – 36, Mike Donlin - 39.
Match of the Weak:
Frank
Leirey receives this as he almost ruined the day for himself and
opponents. Possibly could have had an
effect on the whole course. Seems on #16
Frank hit his ball into the tall grass on the right. While trying to locate his ball, rummaging through
the tall grass, with Charlie Halpin on the other side, he yells out “SKUNK!!!!” Luckily we both got away pretty quick, with
no “was that you Mary Jo.” I never saw
Frank take a drop so quick. This was after Mr. Frank Leirey and Jake
Job-Rivera couldn’t find the Red Tee boxes on #14.
Almost
forgot about the incident on #18. Seems
Greg Arkle got his ball stuck in the tree by the 18th green. Word has it he did not play it where it
landed.
Sandbaggers of the Weak: (5.0
greater or less):
Most Under
Average:
Dave
Gindele shoots 41 (8.6 under average), Eddie Gregory shoots 44 (7.4 under
average), Mike Sullivan shoots 49 (7.4 under average), Mike Breen shoots 44
(5.7 under average), Pat Harms shoots 50 (5.6 under average), Mike Donlin
shoots 39 (5.4 under average).
Most Over
Average:
Izzy
Jewell shoots 55 (8.8 over average).
Status of the
Almighty Fork:
Week 6 - Team Schumacher.
Week 9 – Team Freeman, Team Patmann,
Team Breen.
Week 13 – Team Buescher.
Division
Standings:
o
Division
A has Defending Champs Team Bramlage taking the division lead back and #3 seed
from Team Kiffmeyer. Team Kiffmeyer is
now 12.5 points out of the lead and 42.5 points out of seeding. Team Schumacher falls behind more and is now
84.5 points out of the lead. Team
Patmann brings in 4th at 148 points out and took their place back at
the top of upside down list.
o
Division
B has Team Pfeiffer still holding a lead and #4 Seed. Team Kientz brings in second and is now 9.5 points
out of the lead. Team Flynn still holds
3rd and is narrowed the gap to 34.5 points out. Team Buescher finally brings in a win and is
now 71 points out of the lead.
o
Division
C has Team Anderson (The Shirts) still holding their lead and the #1 Seed. Team Harms (#5 Seed) closed in and is only
10.5 points out. Team Vaughn brings in 3rd
and holds the #6 Seed and narrowed the gap to 61.5 points out. Team
Freeman brings in 4th and is still working on being the spoiler.
o
Division
D has Team Leirey still holding their lead and the #2 seed. Team Halpin in 2nd place fell
again on points and is now 48.5 points out of the lead (46 points out of
seeding). Team Slye brings in 3rd
and is still 72 points out of the lead (69.5 out of seeding). Team
Breen comes in 4th and is still working on being a spoiler.
Current Seeding:
1.
Team
Anderson
2.
Team
Leirey
3.
Team
Bramlage
4.
Team
Pfeiffer
5.
Team
Harms
6.
Team
Vaughn
Heard in the Clubhouse:
According to Team Breen there was
another assassination attempt this week.
Seems I someone teeing off on #14 sent the ball through the woods
and down onto #13 almost taking out players from Team Breen and Team Slye. Thank you Mr. Mike Breen for returning my
ball that was meant to take out Team Slye.
(Note: when attempting to take
out any competition don’t have your name on the ball.)
Mr.
Pat Breen telling Mr. Mike Breen (“don’t put your hand up”). Could that be
another nomination for League Secretary.
Dick Flynn finally getting a Greenie. Wow!!!
Things I saw written:
#13 – Mr. Long Putt Goodwin (Not
Bill Z)
#18 – Mr. Feldman (Not Goodwin…Yet)
Question for the Weak/Thoughts to
Ponder:
Received
this from President Col. Tom Schumacher:
2016 Darwin Awards:
Eighth Place -
·
In Detroit, a 41-year-old man got stuck and
drowned in two feet of water after squeezing head first through an 18-inch-wide
sewer grate to retrieve his car keys.
Seventh Place -
·
A 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker, who
"totally zoned when he ran", accidentally jogged off a 100-foot high
cliff on his daily run.
Sixth Place -
·
While at the beach, Daniel Jones, 21, dug an
8-foot hole for protection from the wind and had been sitting in a beach chair
at the bottom, when it collapsed, burying him beneath 5 feet of sand. People on
the beach used their hands and shovels trying to get him out but could not
reach him. It took rescue workers using heavy equipment almost an hour to free
him. Jones was pronounced dead at a hospital.
Fifth Place -
·
Santiago Alvarado, 24, was killed as he fell
through the ceiling of a bicycle shop he was burglarizing. Death was caused
when the long flashlight he had placed in his mouth to keep his hands free
rammed into the base of his skull as he hit the floor.
Fourth Place -
·
Sylvester Briddell,
Jr., 26, was killed as he won a bet with friends who said he would not put a
revolver loaded with four bullets into his mouth and pull the trigger.
Third Place -
·
After stepping around a marked police patrol car
parked at the front door, a man walked into H&J Leather & Firearms
intent on robbing the store. The shop was full of customers and a uniformed
officer was standing at the counter. Upon seeing the officer, the would-be
robber announced a hold-up and fired a few wild shots from a target pistol. The officer and a clerk promptly returned fire, and several customers
also drew their guns and fired. The robber was pronounced dead at the scene by
Paramedics. Crime scene
investigators located 47 expended cartridge cases in the shop. The subsequent
autopsy revealed 23 gunshot wounds. Ballistics identified rounds from 7 different weapons. No one else was hurt.
HONORABLE MENTION -
·
Paul Stiller, 47, and his wife Bonnie were bored
just driving around at 2 A.M. …so they lit a quarter stick
of dynamite to toss out the window to see what would happen. Apparently, they
failed to notice that the window was closed.
RUNNER UP -
·
Kerry Bingham had been drinking with several
friends when one of them said they knew a person who had bungee-jumped from a
local bridge in the middle of traffic. The conversation grew more excited, and at least 10 men trooped along the walkway of
the bridge at 4:30 AM. Upon arrival at the midpoint of the bridge, they
discovered that no one had brought a bungee rope. Bingham, who had continued
drinking, volunteered and pointed out that a coil of lineman's cable lay
nearby. They secured one end around Bingham's leg and then tied the other to
the bridge. His fall lasted 40 feet before the cable tightened and tore his
foot off at the ankle. He miraculously survived his fall into the icy water and
was rescued by two nearby fishermen. Bingham's foot was never located.
AND THE WINNER IS....
·
Zookeeper Friedrich Riesfeldt
(Paderborn, Germany) fed his constipated elephant 22 doses of animal laxative
and more than a bushel of berries, figs and prunes before the plugged-up
pachyderm finally got relief. Investigators say ill-fated Friedrich, 46, was
attempting to give the ailing elephant an olive oil enema when the relieved
beast unloaded. The sheer force of the elephant's unexpected
defecation knocked Mr Riesfeldt
to the ground where he struck his head on a rock as the elephant continued to
evacuate 200 pounds of dung on top of him. It seems to be just one of those
freak accidents that proves... 'Shit happens'
Summary of Rounds Played – August 2,
2017
THIS WEEK |
TO DATE |
|
REGULARS |
53 |
854 |
SUBS |
11 |
98 |
NO SHOWS |
0 |
8 |
Match Results
TEAM NAME |
POINTS |
TEAM NAME |
POINTS |
TEAM NAME |
POINTS |
TEAM NAME |
POINTS |
BRAMLAGE |
69 |
PATMANN |
34 |
KIENTZ |
34.5 |
BUESCHER |
56.5 |
SCHUMACHER |
21 |
KIFFMEYER |
56 |
FLYNN |
55.5 |
PFEIFFER |
33.5 |
TEAM NAME |
POINTS |
TEAM NAME |
POINTS |
TEAM NAME |
POINTS |
TEAM NAME |
POINTS |
ANDERSON |
28 |
FREEMAN |
23.5 |
HALPIN |
34 |
BREEN |
34 |
VAUGHN |
62 |
HARMS |
66.5 |
LEIREY |
56 |
SLYE |
56 |
Medalist
COURSE |
NAME |
SCORE |
FRONT |
Tom Schumacher & Bill Zachritz |
38 |
BACK NINE |
Kevin Bachmann & Paul Haubner |
36 |
Eagle/Hole in One
None |
Eagle/Hole in One Pool
$2.00 was added to the Eagle pool. The pool now has $98.00 in it. (Note: Must be in
Skins to win Eagle Pot.)
Birdies
#2 |
Cecil Begley & Larry Oliver |
Both in Skins |
#2 |
Jim Grassinger |
Not in Skins |
#6 |
Jim Grassinger |
Not in Skins |
#8 |
Tom Marsh |
Skin -- $60.00 |
#9 |
Tom Schumacher, Bill Zachritz
& Don Buescher |
All in Skins |
#10 |
Kevin Bachmann |
Skin -- $11.00 |
#10 |
Paul Haubner |
Not in Skins |
#13 |
Mike Breen |
Skin -- $11.00 |
#17 |
Mike Donlin |
Skin -- $11.00 |
Note: To all Team Captains or those
regulars that complete the “Point Sheet” after the match is completed, please
ensure that all birdies are recorded on the “Point Sheet”.
Other Skins
#11 |
Kevin Bachmann |
Skin -- $11.00 |
Par |
Greenies
#5 |
Dick Flynn |
$11.00 |
#7 |
Dale Schaber |
$11.00 |
#13 |
Mike Breen |
$7.00 |
Closest to Pin 2nd Shot
#14 |
Steve Duddey |
$7.00 |
Long Putt
#9 |
Tom Schumacher |
$21.00 |
#18 |
Charlie Halpin |
$15.00 |
Money Leaders -- Top 10 & Ties
Bachmann, Kevin |
$
174.00 |
Slye, Mark |
$
152.00 |
Halpin, Mark |
$
131.00 |
Ruehl, Steve |
$
110.00 |
Vaughn, Ray |
$
110.00 |
Goodwin, Dale |
$
107.00 |
Reckers, Chuck |
$
99.00 |
Marley, Boyd |
$
91.00 |
Buescher, Patrick |
$
90.00 |
Donlin, Mike |
$
88.00 |
Skins—Greenies—Long Putt
Most of the regulars and subs in the
league know about Skins, Greenies, and Long Putt. For those that do not, each
week there will be a sheet and a box on one of the tables in the clubhouse. The sheet will have the names of all the
regulars and blank lines at the bottom for subs to write in their names. $3.00 entry fee for Skins;
$1.00 entry fee for Greenies and $1.00 entry fee for Long Putt. Place a check mark for each category for which
you are participating. If the Briefcase is not out notate on your
scorecard your intent to play and pay when you complete your match. First teams out please take the markers, last
teams in please bring markers in.
Newsletter provided by:
Charles Halpin
IRS Golf League Secretary
Mr. Jim Bram-la-ge
continues his quest to become League secretary and is running a golf altering
agenda. If enough rules are changed he
should be able to easily defeat all opponents.
My suggestion stands that anyone with an average below 44 should move to
the Blue tee boxes, 45 and above to the White tee boxes, and only women and
those men over age 80 (no maybe age 90) on the forward tees. Women over age 45 (or average over 45) should
be able to move to the end of the fairway and tee up. Sorry Mr. Frank Leirey there are no Red Tees. Complaint Chairman Bill (still no skins, no long putts, and no
greenies) Zachritz still without any.
Thanks for your donations. As
always, this paragraph may or may not have many or no errors. Read at your own risk, especially this line
as some have suffered severe eye strain… or loss of motion from falling over
laughing…or severe shock…