IRS Wednesday Golf League Newsletter

Week 10 – July 1, 2015

A Division’s has Team Buescher with a slim lead over Team Zachritz.  Team Anderson and Team Kiffmeyer picked up a little and are both hanging in there.  No fork this week.

B Division has Team Donlin still in the lead with Team Pfeiffer 37 points behind.  Team Bramlage and Team Freeman avoided the fork but time is running out. 

C Division has Team Leirey still in the lead after suffering another loss and falling to the number 2 seed.  Team Harms moved up to second passing up Team Patmann.  Team Schumacher (forked) with a win is still trying to work their way out of the bottom.

D Division has Team Flynn with another nice win moving up to number 1 seed and a comfortable lead in the division.  Team Kientz is showing some hope for maybe a wild card spot and Team Halpin is hoping not to get forked (still can’t do it to my team).  Team Breen (forked) looks to have the bottom mastered; however they can be a spoiler to the opponents.

We had 7 subs this week.  Subs this week were Will Freeman, Ray Woods, Jo Diehl, Greg Arkle, Larry Oliver, Melody Oswalt, and Mike Breen.

Most under average at 5+ under average:  Jim Westcott shoots 36 (6.2 under average), Chris Kerns shoots 39 (6.8 under average), and Jim Hill shoots 44 (9.0 under average). 

There were 9 Birdies this week, 5 on the front and 4 on the back.

Heard around the Clubhouse:  Mr. Kerns (still being stalked by the beer girls) states that California Course has the best beer girls of any course he’s played.

And this coming from President Tom Schumacher:

 

WHAT ARE WE NOT KNOWN FOR!!!
 
Most US States have at least one claim to fame.  
For example, 95% of the Bourbon produced in the US comes from Kentucky.  
In addition, each of the 50 states has something about it that is "lesser-known".  
In this and the next four Newsletters we will let you know what these are.  
Following are the first 10 states in alphabetical order.
 
Alabama -- First use of the 911 system.
Alaska -- Highest number of volcanoes in the US.
Arizona -- Longest running NFL franchise (the Cardinals,1898).
Arkansas -- Only state with a producing diamond mine.
California -- Largest supplier of milk.
Colorado -- Longest commercial-aircraft runway.
Connecticut -- Largest collection of human brain specimens on display in the US.
Delaware -- Only state with no national-park areas.
Florida –- Most deaths due to lightning (47 since 2005).
Georgia -- State with the most panda bears (9).
 

And one more thing from Prez Schu:

 
Warning about E-Bay 
 
If you buy stuff on line, 
check out the seller carefully. 
 
A friend of mine just spent $95, plus tax, 
on a penis enlarger. 
 
Bastards sent him a magnifying glass. 
 
The only instruction said, 
"Do not use in sunlight."                             

 

And words/thoughts to ponder from Mr. Tim Feldman:

 

FOR THOSE WHO LOVE THE PHILOSOPHY OF AMBIGUITY, AS WELL AS THE IDIOSYNCRASIES OF ENGLISH:

 

1. ONE TEQUILA, TWO TEQUILA, THREE TEQUILA...... FLOOR.

2. ATHEISM IS A NON-PROPHET ORGANIZATION.

3. IF MAN EVOLVED FROM MONKEYS AND APES, WHY DO WE STILL HAVE MONKEYS AND APES?

4. THE MAIN REASON THAT SANTA IS SO JOLLY IS BECAUSE HE KNOWS WHERE ALL THE BAD GIRLS LIVE.

5. I WENT TO A BOOKSTORE AND ASKED THE SALESWOMAN, “WHERE’S THE SELF-HELP SECTION?" SHE SAID IF SHE TOLD ME, IT WOULD DEFEAT THE PURPOSE.

6. WHAT IF THERE WERE NO HYPOTHETICAL QUESTIONS?

7. IF A DEAF CHILD SIGNS SWEAR WORDS, DOES HIS MOTHER WASH HIS HANDS WITH SOAP?

8. IF SOMEONE WITH MULTIPLE PERSONALITIES THREATENS TO KILL HIMSELF, IS IT CONSIDERED A HOSTAGE SITUATION?

9. IS THERE ANOTHER WORD FOR SYNONYM?

10. WHERE DO FOREST RANGERS GO TO "GET AWAY FROM IT ALL?"

 

11. WOULD A FLY WITHOUT WINGS BE CALLED A WALK?

12. WHY DO THEY LOCK GAS STATION BATHROOMS? ARE THEY AFRAID SOMEONE WILL BREAK-IN AND CLEAN THEM?

13. IF A TURTLE DOESN'T HAVE A SHELL, IS HE HOMELESS OR NAKED?

14. CAN VEGETARIANS EAT ANIMAL CRACKERS17. IF THE POLICE ARREST A MUTE, DO THEY TELL HIM HE HAS THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT?

15. IF THE POLICE ARREST A MUTE, DO THEY TELL HIM HE HAS THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT?

                    

Summary of Rounds Played – July 1, 2015

THIS WEEK

TO DATE

REGULARS

57

564

SUBS

7

74

NO SHOWS

0

2

Match Results

TEAM NAME

POINTS

TEAM NAME

POINTS

TEAM NAME

POINTS

TEAM NAME

POINTS

ANDERSON

69.5

ZACHRITZ

29

FLYNN

66

HALPIN

34.5

BREEN

20.5

KIENTZ

61

BUESCHER

24

KIFFMEYER

55.5

TEAM NAME

POINTS

TEAM NAME

POINTS

TEAM NAME

POINTS

TEAM NAME

POINTS

DONLIN

67

BRAMLAGE

41

HARMS

59

LEIREY

22.5

PATMANN

23

SCHUMACHER

49

PFEIFFER

31

FREEMAN

67.5

Medalist

COURSE

NAME

SCORE

FRONT NINE

Jim  Westcott

36

BACK NINE

Chris Kerns

39

Eagle/Hole in One

None

Eagle/Hole in One Pool

$4.00 was added to the pool.  The pool now has $66.00 in it.

Birdies

#2

Mark Halpin

Skin -- $8.00

#4

Jeff Witt

Skin -- $8.00

#5

Jim Westcott

Skin -- $8.00

#8

Tim Feldman

Skin -- $8.00

#9

Jim Westcott

Skin -- $8.00

#13

John Freeman

Not in Skins

#16

Don Potter

Skin -- $21.00

#16

Joe Devereux

Not in Skins

#18

Ray Woods

Skin -- $21.00

Note: To all Team Captains or those regulars that complete the "Point Sheet" after the match is completed, please ensure that all birdies are recorded on the "Point Sheet".

Other Skins

#7

Jay Ackerman

Skin -- $8.00

Par

Greenies

#5

Farlon Smith

$10.00

#7

Tim Feldman

$10.00

#13

Chris Kerns

$7.00

Closest to Pin 2nd Shot

#14

Steve Duddey

$7.00

Long Putt

#9

Jim Westcott

$20.00

#18

Ray Woods

$16.00

Money Leaders -- Top 10 & Ties

Westcott, Jim

 $     80.00

Crouch, Lee

 $     78.00

Schumacher, Tom

 $     74.00

Donlin, Mike

 $     73.00

Witt, Jeff

 $     72.00

Feldman, Tim

 $     58.00

Freeman, Will

 $     58.00

Kerns, Chris

 $     58.00

Buescher, Don

 $     55.00

Flynn, Dick

 $     55.00


Skins—Greenies—Long Putt

Most of the regulars and subs in the league know about Skins, Greenies, and Long Putt. For those that do not, each week there will be a sheet and a box on one of the tables in the clubhouse.  The sheet will have the names of all the regulars and blank lines at the bottom for subs to write in their names. $3.00 entry fee for Skins; $1.00 entry fee for Greenies; and $1.00 entry fee for Long Putt ($5.00 for all).  Place a check mark for each category for which you are participating.  If the Briefcase is not out notate on your scorecard your intent to play and pay when you complete your match.  First teams out please take the markers, last teams in please bring markers in.