IRS Wednesday Golf League Newsletter

Week 7 – June 10, 2020

With the threat of severe storms and one short weather delay we managed to get our rounds in. Seems social distancing is working okay so far. Gave out a lot of mask to league members, hope that helps to keep everyone healthy.

Another reminder on green fees and cart fees are still being paid by the league treasurer Chuck Reckers. For those okay with riding 2 in a cart with teammates that is now acceptable. For those who said they will walk but wish to change to walk front and ride back you need to let the league treasurer Chuck Reckers know by Tuesdays 6 p.m. so he can update his records and notify the course on number of carts we will need. If a player wants to commit to ride the back or both sides Chuck will update his records and collect the cart fees as part of the second installment in mid to late July. Reminder that no changing your mind at the course.

Subs this past week: Mike Schwarberg (Team Kientz), Steve Ruehl (Team Bramlage), Sue Kerrick (Team Leirey), Brad Ferguson (Team Buescher), and new sub Matt Johnson (Team Bachmann). Thanks for being there.

Good Rounds: Front: Kevin Bachmann – 34; Garry Melish – 39.

Most under/over average (5+/-) (Sandbagger of the Weak):

Warning – identity of sandbaggers is coming soon.

Division Standings:

A Division:  Team Bramlage in the lead with defending Champs Team Kiffmeyer not too far back. Note: This division brining in the most points so far.

Division B:  Team Flynn in the lead with Team Halpin not too far back. Note: Team Leirey at the bottom or should I say the top of the upside down list (Fork is being sharpened).

Division C:  Team Breen in the lead here with Team Zachritz not too far away. Note: This is the 2^nd highest scoring division, and Team Harms is in close competition for top of the upside down list.

Division D:  Team Bachmann with a commanding lead in this division. Note: Vacant team only 64.5 points out of the lead. 

Three teams with no losses: Team Bramlage, Team Bachmann, & Team Kiffmeyer.

Three teams with no wins: Team Buescher, Team Harms, Team Leirey.

Heard in the Clubhouse (Outside):

With social distancing I could not hear any conversations, maybe next week.

Words of Whizdumb:

Something from League President Tom Schumacher

Heaven and Hell

While walking down the street one day a Corrupt Senator (oxymoron) was tragically hit by a car and died.    His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St Peter at the entrance. 
"Welcome to heaven," says St.. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in," says the Senator.
"Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from the higher ups. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity."

"Really? I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the Senator.

"I'm sorry, but we have our rules."   And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. 
The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course.    In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him. 
Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the 
expense of the people. 
They played a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and the finest champagne. 
Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who is having a good time dancing and telling jokes. 
They are all having such a good time that before the Senator realizes it, it is time to go. 
Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the door closes.   The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens in heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him, "Now it's time to visit heaven..."
So, 24 hours passed with the Senator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns. 
"Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity."

The Senator reflects for a minute, then he answers: "Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell." 
So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell... 
Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls to the ground. 
The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulders. 
"I don't understand," stammers the Senator. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?" 
The devil smiles at him and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning, Today, you voted.."

Summary of Rounds Played – June 10, 2020

	THIS WEEK	TO DATE
REGULARS	55	167
SUBS	5	10
VACANT	4	12
NO SHOWS	0	3

Match Results

TEAM NAME	POINTS	TEAM NAME	POINTS	TEAM NAME	POINTS	TEAM NAME	POINTS
BACHMANN	64.5	FLYNN	63.5	LEIREY	24	HALPIN	33
BUESCHER	25.5	VAUGHN	26.5	VACANT 4	66	PFEIFFER	57
TEAM NAME	POINTS	TEAM NAME	POINTS	TEAM NAME	POINTS	TEAM NAME	POINTS
KIENTZ	24	KIFFMEYER	60	HARMS	25	ANDERSON	27
SCHUMACHER	66	BREEN	30	BRAMLAGE	65	ZACHRITZ	63

Medalist

COURSE	NAME	SCORE
FRONT NINE	KEVIN BACHMANN	34
BACK NINE	CHRIS KERNS & STEVE RUEHL	41

Eagle/Hole in One

NONE

Birdies

#2	KEVIN BACHMANN
#4	KEVIN BACHMANN
#4	DICK FLYNN
#4	MIKE DONLIN
#4	CHRIS BUNGE
#14	VINNY CONSOLA
#15	STEVE RUEHL

Note: No money games until social distancing ends.

Notes are courtesy of:

League Secretary Charlie Halpin